So, we bought it. We had our Unicorn. Now, what to do with it?
It was clear that we needed some transformation to make our forever home. I started making lists. Lots of lists.
What did we want?
New kitchen with island.
Custom cabinets throughout the house.
Creation of a new walk-in pantry between the kitchen & the hallway. Kudos to Kim, our superstar real estate agent, that saw the opportunity to build this pantry by converting a space that had a built-in television. We added found space on the other side of the back wall, that had some cabinetry in the hallway … delivering a space that is 4’x6′. Perfect for a pantry.
New appliances for the new dream kitchen.
New plumbing fixtures for the new bathrooms.
Recessed lighting + ceiling fans in all rooms.
Smart controls for appliances, lighting, thermostat, sprinklers … and more.
Finally, the home’s 3 car garage would become a 1 car garage for Mrs M, and a 2-car garage shop for me.
A new table saw. And, at long last, a miter saw to easily break down lumber.
So then I started making spreadsheets. Lots of spreadsheets.
We met with our first contractor before we had the keys. That didn’t work out. He was in a transition – building his new shop/retail location, we were still developing the plan, we didn’t have possession yet … no. Strike 1.
Lots of planning went into every room … or in this case, shop. I get a purpose-built space that has the tools & space for the work I actually do. I can break down a 4’x8′ sheet of plywood, or cut a 12′ long board without breaking a sweat. In the shop. Without moving tools. Without using the driveway.
We met our 2nd contractor on February 28, the day we took possession. This was a big idea guy that had a particular way he wanted to do a big job like ours. Big job. Very professional presentation from the jump. I met all of the sub contractors he would recommend to us, and then the wheels started to come off. The cabinet guy was on vacation and could not meet with us for a week. And we lost a week before we even got started.
OK, that happens. But then this cabinet maker came back to meet with us, and couldn’t commit to a time he could begin construction. After several days, we got his quote (he accidentally sent it to us directly. Oopsie.) Then we got the entire consolidated quote from the general contractor a few days later.
The quote was over our projected budget, but more importantly, there was no promise of timing AT ALL. No projected date to begin. Just … approve this budget and we will talk about it.
Uh, no. I was in sales my whole life, and as we saw with Williams Homes, when sales techniques annoy me, I run for the hills. Strike 2.
I started to look for tradesmen myself. Then, I finally listened to our son-in-law. He knew a guy.
This guy, whom I met when Little Girl married son-in-law, was a childhood friend that grew up to be a contractor. And a groomsman, for that matter.
It happens. And life-long friends can be a wonderful thing.
Contractor #3 promised to introduce me to the right people. He would help & advise, but I would be left to supervise the process that we were oh, so invested in.
I began to stitch together a team. Some vendors were recommended to me, some we found on our own. All were available to begin work … soon. Very soon.
I created floorplans. Worklists. Ideas to be incorporated into each room.
We hired crews for garage door opener installation, epoxy floor installation, kitchen demo, plumbing, stone work, electrical, cabinetry, HVAC, roofing, chimney service, paint, carpet, and a keymaster. We bought appliances, plumbing fixtures, tile and stone slabs. We chose colors. We bought carpet.
It was the Fall of ’24, and we were distraught by the difficulty of buying a new house. We made up a priority list:
A single story home. We talked about going smaller, but we decided to stick with a 4+3: 4 bedrooms, 3 baths. Converting 2 bedrooms would make an office for me and an office today or a hobby room for Mrs M in her retirement, and still leave a guest room for our visitors.
Mrs M’s perfect kitchen: Room to cook. An island. A conversation area. The center of the home.
A shop space for me. A place to create. A place to escape from Mrs M.
A nice, quiet location in Castaic or nearby Santa Clarita.
Surprise! That’s almost impossible to find.
Come to find out, single story homes are relatively rare in the Santa Clarita Valley, where larger 2-story homes are built on the standard lots to increase builder profits. In some newer developments now selling in Santa Clarita, all 1-story homes are designated as 55+ senior communities. If you want to live in an all ages neighborhood … that pretty much means you are in a 2-story house.
Unless you go searching for perfection, it seems. When we started I had no idea that a single story home with a great kitchen & some nice shop space would be unusual. Or hard to find.
Oopsie. We were looking for a unicorn.
Kim to the rescue! Our real estate agent automated some email searches for us, and we began getting emails of 1-story homes for sale in our area. We also got emails of all homes for sale in our immediate neighborhood. We supplemented those emails based on the MLS real estate listings with our own searches on Zillow … all of which helped us understand what we were up against.
We went to see some homes.
A 6 acre property up Hasley Canyon … nice in a rural setting. EXCELLENT shop. But this older home’s kitchen didn’t pass muster, and we decided we really didn’t want a large property to take care of.
A lovely, updated home in old Newhall in the style of a Spanish hacienda. Nice 4-car garage I could convert to a shop. But, this older home had additions built on a time or 3, so the layout was just a bit odd. Lovely kitchen, but dark. And, yikes, it was expensive. In the end, it just wasn’t … right. Like Harry Potter trying to use the wrong magic wand. We kept looking.
There was horse property up Placerita Canyon that was interesting. Room to build a shop. But, there were steps to enter and steps to get to the dining room. This became a hard no for that reason … Mrs M has seen houses just not work for her elderly patients because of a step or 2 in the living space. Since this wants to be our forever home, we didn’t want to buy a problem in the making.
Another home in the Placerita Canyon neighborhood popped up, and it was a lovely property. Large lawn + a swimming pool in the back yard. 6 car garage/outbuilding with an RV garage door. But, the living room was actually a converted garage with a 7′ ceiling. Bedrooms were oddly laid out … we thought about it. I worked the numbers. And the house had multiple offers above the asking price immediately, so we just moved on. No 6 car garage for me.
Lovely homes up Hasley Canyon Road (just like the Williams Homes development), but none that were on sale checked off our boxes … those not for sale did not matter, no matter how lovely they appeared to be while on our drive-bys of the neighborhoods we were interested in.
An older home on The Old Road (fitting, that) in Castaic came up, and it had nice parking space for my trailer and little else, actually. There was a bit of property … but it was hillside. It was landscaped, sprinkled … and a fire risk. Hard no.
We visited one of the new developments near us, Tesoro. Single story & 55+ only. Postage stamp yards. I mean, tiny even by LA standards. The driveways in front of the garages were not big enough to park on, it seemed, without covering the sidewalk. The homes were truly lovely … but no.
We drove through the new developments behind Magic Mountain. Several developments are growing here, but none seemed like they were our unicorn. We kept driving.
Time passed. Suddenly, it was January 2025, and we were seemingly no closer to any decisions. Unicorns are rare, after all.
And Mrs M’s knees were not good. She went bionic on January 10 with a TKR: Total Knee Replacement. So, naturally, a nice looking house was found on January 11. I went to see it with Kim, and I was very interested. Mrs M, meanwhile, could barely walk.
So we gave it 48 hours, and her first outing after surgery was to go see what was our unicorn. We put an offer in, endured a very small bidding war with another buyer, and our offer to buy the house was accepted in a week. We closed after a short escrow, and got the keys on February 28.
We developed plans. Big plans. The house was very nice, but needed Velda’s perfect kitchen and updated bathrooms. The shop part of the 3 car garage needed extensive electrical work. Suddenly, we owned 2 houses and a new hobby: making our forever home.
Our new house is fully landscaped, which is a nice relief versus buying new construction. The exterior will be untouched, for now. The interior … we’re going all in.
And just to prove that God has a sense of humor, while we were in escrow, Williams Homes reached out to Kim to say that they were (finally) ready to allow us to buy Lot 76, that Model #9 with a 3-car garage. Sorry, Buttercup. I was a very good prospect for Williams Homes, but now I’m … just not interested in doing business with you.
I had been living with it for a while before I decided I was done. She was done. The problem, you see, was her knees. Going up stairs had become a painful process for her … and I wanted to end her pain.
You know what I mean. At least, I hope you know what I mean.
So I suggested it was time to leave the familial home of 37 years. Leave the 2nd story behind, and find a one story house. It was time.
And just like that, we were searching for a new house.
It didn’t take long for us to find a local, new development called Williams Ranch. The models were oh-so-spiffy, and we began the process of selecting our new forever home. It took a minute, but this planned community of a development had a few features that caught our eyes. Mrs M could get her dream kitchen, at long last. And I could get a nice shop as well, in an oversized garage (they called it an RV garage) that could be the new home of the Woodshop.
Thus began a courtship that lasted over a year. This whole buying a house thing was not easy, we found.
The sign that initially caught our eye. Unfortunately, after 2 years of development, they had never built a Toy Garage. Size was unknown. RV garages had been built … but rarely. Red Flag # 1.
We met our first sales rep in November of ’23. We had settled on a model #9 as our target, and he showed us a couple that they had built. One was ready to move in, one just needed us to select the flooring.
But there was no RV garage. We said no.
And the sales rep said “I don’t think this will work out for you,” kicked us to the curb, and assigned a new sales rep to handle us. OK, whatever. I spent more than 2 decades running a sales team, and I do understand that things happen. I also understand that when a rep doesn’t like the prospect, nothing good will happen.
Our new sales rep, however, was wonderful. It was now January of ’24, and she took us to the site of a future model #9, plot 40. We could even get it with an RV garage!
But, sales rep #2 told us, we would have to buy a retaining wall to move the slope on the lot back to make room for the RV garage. No worries, the developer would split the cost with is, so it was only an additional $75,000. Further, #2 told us, when we went to contract we would have to put down $25,000 as a deposit, plus pay 50% for all upgrades as they were added to the contract. So, in this case, the opening deposit would be $25,000 + $75,000 for the wall + $70,000 for the RV garage. Due immediately.
But first, before we could do ANYTHING, we needed to get credit pre-approval from their approved lender, which would do a loan application, credit check, and verify that we could actually buy the house.
That was all fascinating information. Information that our previous rep never shared with us (because it wasn’t going to work out for us, I’m sure).
So we had 2 things that had to get done: get credit approval, and get down payment funds lined up. We did the application and got a contingent credit approval on January 30, 2024. The contingency was that we needed to sell our current house to buy the new house.
After consulting with our excellent real estate agent, Kim Thompson, (who is a long-time client of the Woodshop), we determined that we needed to get a HELOC.
Which I had never heard of.
Home Equity Line Of Credit, HELOC, would allow us to cash out some equity from our current, mortgage-free home, and use those funds to purchase a new house. OK, that would work. Our days of having no mortgage were over, and we got the HELOC to prepare for our purchase of the mythical model # 9.
Which Williams Ranch would not sell to us. Apparently the lot #40 that we rejected due to the retaining wall was the only possible RV garage available in the development until … well, we don’t know when. Later. Whenever the developer releases a lot that is big enough. Which we don’t know when it will be. At all.
We offered to make a down payment so we were first in line for this mythical new house. No, sorry. No down payment wanted. They didn’t want our money, because they had “no idea” when they might be ready to build a house for us.
It was April ’24, and we were beyond frustrated. The developer shared almost no forward-looking information with us. We could buy what they had … or wait.
We waited.
Summer heated up, as expected, and eventually the upcoming “phase 15” was identified as having 2 homes that might work for us. Lot 75 had a model #12 which would have an RV garage. The money was a bit more for this larger home, but finally we had a shot. Also, lot 76 would be for a model #9 which might be able to have an RV garage, too. Maybe. Our sales rep, #2, told us our credit pre-approval from their preferred lender was first in line, so this could work. We were first in line.
September rolled around, and there was trouble in paradise. Yes, they were building the homes. No, we were no longer first in line. Because someone with an all-cash offer jumped the line.
Which sales rep #2 never told us would be a possibility.
The plot of a Plan 12 … only available with dimensions by taking a picture of the big monitor in the show room. Sales materials were lacking at times. Red Flag # 2.
We immediately found another way forward, and received “credit” approval for an all-cash offer on the house within a week. The new approval letter was dated September 14. But, our new all-cash offer date was in September, so we were no longer in first place. We were too late to the dance.
And the model #9 … would not have an RV garage. It would have “just” a 3rd car garage, because that was all there was room for on this particular lot.
And no, no deposit was possible. But we were not first in line for the #12 and although we were first in line for the #9, that could change at any moment since the developer could choose to do business with someone else if they chose. Pre-approvals were not binding.
It was September, and after pursuing a home purchase with Williams Ranch for 11 months, we had NOTHING. No schedule. No commitment. No plan.
Kim, our real estate agent, was as hot as we were, and she escalated the issue to Sales Rep #2’s Sales Manager. And her Vice President. And his President. They all said we were out of luck. Their choice. Their development. Buh-bye.
We were beyond angry.
Then Sales Rep #2 got fired.
This actually offended me, as Sales Rep #2 was the only company representative that shared relevant information with us. To this day, I do not believe that Sales Rep #2 cost us our purchase. I believe Sales Rep #1, to use the vernacular, snaked the sale by knowing our original contingent credit approval date, and worked with his client to beat it. Do I know that? No.
But I do know that #2 got fired as this whole bunch of crap came to light, and I very much regret that, as I believe she did nothing wrong. Perhaps she did not understand company policy correctly. Perhaps her boss or her boss’s boss did not train her properly. I’ll never know.
But I do know this: when the client is angry, nothing good follows. I am enough of a sales guy that when I am mistreated by a company, I don’t want to give them my money.
At all.
So in the Fall of 2024, we began to look for alternatives, as we continued to keep our eye on the #12 or the #9. Which would be available for sale … someday. Maybe to us, or maybe not. No way to know.
The Board Chronicles is an ongoing series of articles about the adventures of Mrs M’s Handmade as a vendor at community festivals & craft fairs. Mrs M’s subsidiary, Mr M’s Woodshop, has been approved to create this chronicle for the good of vendorkind.
There is nothing like an event in your home town. Easy transport. Sleep in your own bed. Smiles from lots of familiar faces.
What could go wrong?
New Ideas
A new display for cutting boards! It only took me about 18 months to take the time to build it.
A new display for handled boards! This did not take as long, but definitely upped my game from using the cast-off crates from Mrs M’s unused display as I had been doing.
I have live edge side tables, or perhaps a coffee table, available this weekend. First time. They were made by a buddy and our local contractor, Steve Mark of Steve Mark Construction. Truly great work. Wonder if there are furniture buyers at the Home & Garden Show?
Observations
This is one of the very few events that I do a triple booth at. This means I must put up the 10’x20′ Trimline canopy as well as a 10’x10′ pop-up. I then put 13x tables in the booth to show … everything. Well, not really. Today with my built out foodie inventory, I had no room for cribbage boards, chess boards, or Magic Bottle Openers. In a triple booth, I am out of room. l think I have a problem.
Set up is on Friday, and I actually had some help. I brought in the Cat Sitter for some help, and then our contractor, Steve Mark, lent a hand since I was going to sell a couple of tables he made. Loved the help.
Before I left check-in, I was cautioned – as was everyone – that high winds were expected overnight in Santa Clarita. Keep your canopies low and weighted! I, of course, do this routinely and wind, though a real concern, is nothing that I worry about in normal conditions. The canopies went up, the weights and ratchet straps went on, and my canopies will not move.
2 other canopies were lost to wind during set up. I heard product breaking on some gusts throughout the weekend.
Hometown.
Set up was fairly simple with the help. I got it done in about 5 hours, start to finish. That left some touch ups, price signs and cracker displays to be done before the 10a start on Saturday.
One quirk of this show is that they always shut off vehicle access for Saturday morning. No drive into the site to drop off inventory on Saturday. Not a problem, just plan ahead. I have a little wheeled crate to make carrying in my electronic gear (charged overnight) and cooler easier to bring in from the parking lot. That was commented on; not everyone lets wheels do the work.
First customer was the husband of an exhibitor. I inquired about her business … she’s a medium, helps contact the departed. That was the first time I have heard that answer at any event.
An older gentleman approached, walking with a cane. “OK, here’s a quiz. What kind of wood is this?” I unfortunately had no idea. He then explained it was an Irish Shillelagh, made from a root of some tree or bush. Still didn’t know what it was!
One conversation I often have (perhaps 5 times this weekend) is … “You don’t cut meat on this board, do you?” The answer, of course, is YES. Some believe meat should be cut on a separate board – this is often due to a fear of bacteria. However, wooden cutting boards are actually naturally anti-bacterial. Research done at the University of Wisconsin and UC Davis has found that, when you infect and then test the bacterial growth on all of the different cutting board surfaces, you’ll find wooden cutting boards have less bacteria after an hour, and after a day. Naturally.
Bacteria can come from ANY food, not just meat. If your lettuce is infected with bacteria when you chop it, then anything cut on the board after that will get tainted if you are not using good clean techniques with your raw food. Without good technique, it really doesn’t matter what cutting board you use, because you can get sick.
I did this explanation, explained how to keep a cutting board clean, and the lady became a customer. I love happy endings.
Hometown.
Saturday was a day of special orders: 4 separate orders were taken, practically simultaneously. I got ‘whelmed early, and had 4 transactions happening all at once. Life gets exciting in the hometown.
Legacy customers are the best part of local events. One customer stood in the middle of the booth and said, “I have one of those, and one of those, and….”
Nothing like local.
Mrs M still has fans out there … I was asked again when Mrs M will return with her soaps and lotions and such. I have a standard answer: I don’t know. I encourage you, dear reader, to talk to her and demand she get back to making, as I am out of my soap. She formulated it just for me. A delicate flower, I am, and I need my soap.
Many people verified I was a local vendor throughout the event. My house is about 3 miles from the event site. And the logo does say it all:
Come to find out I made a mistake on the cutting board display. I knew that I wanted the dowels holding the boards upright to be 8″ apart … but I neglected to consider that a diagonal between dowels was not the same as a vertical line. Ooopsie. Good thing I make everything to be modular. The legs get smaller, the display will be perfect.
I was an hour into my strike when a lady walked up with her son and wanted to buy a cutting board. She was local … but I had the containers (already packed) right there, so I agreed to open some containers to see if any of the boards on hand would speak to her. One did.
It was my biggest sale of the weekend. You just never know when a customer will find you, and when they do, you need to be present. Had I left early, this would have never happened.
The event ended at 4p Sunday, and then my hard work began. I struck the event by myself. It is one of my largest set ups, and I didn’t find help. My bad. I finished about 8:15p, and was in the shower by 8:35p. Dinner quickly followed, and I did not move much after that. As I write this on Monday … the ibuprofen helps. Always.
Going a-vendoring is a glorious, fun thing to do … separated by long stints of very hard work. Be prepared. Always.
Those tables by Steve Mark did not find their forever home this weekend. Pictures are below. And they are still in my truck, so….
This was my 8th year doing this event. I have done it every year since 2015 … since we’re in California, the event was shut down in the covid years. Of course. In any event, in our 11th year of going a-vendoring, here are a few observations for you vendor types:
This is the largest vendor event in Santa Clarita. Largest attendance as well.
However, it is not necessarily the home of the largest sales for every handmade vendor. Home & Garden Shows, after all, are famous for being about … your home & garden. So having a great display of handmade goods may not be a perfect solution for you, depending on what you sell. If you are selling air conditioning services, you may think this is a much better event. Of course, their booth costs are much greater than for vendors of those handmade goods. Thank goodness.
Be clear, I LOVE this event, and it is my top event in Santa Clarita. But is it the best event I do? Alas, no. I have better events when I am out of town … and not sleeping in my own bed. Life is full of trade-offs.
Apparently.
As always, your mileage will vary.
See you out there!
The Food
Best Meal: Velda cooked a steak from Jess & Jim’s Steak House in Kansas City … we get beef from there as a Christmas present. Steak for the win. Of course.
Honorable Mention: Sunday dinner was Polish sausage & mashed potatoes. Velda’s comfort food after a very hard day. Oh, and there was bourbon.
The Facts
Total miles driven: 24
# of people we met during the event from the producer: Many, as always. I knew the people at my hometown radio station long before I went a-vendoring. I worked in the radio industry for nearly 3 decades, after all!
Visits in the booth by a promoter’s representative: sure. Lots.
It was time to embrace the chaos and make some chaos boards. I mean, look around. Right?
I last did this 5 years ago, and my techniques have been refined a bit. To make these boards, I selected 256 boards, each 24″ long. The boards were from 21 hardwood species, and were glued up initially into 15x different laminates. These had 3x different thicknesses, which were smoothed and then cut into strips that were 1-5/8″ wide to turn them into end grain boards.
And I was just getting started.
Those 1-5/8″ strips were then selected so that each of the 13x end grain glue ups I made had at least one strip from each of the original laminates. After the glue was fully cured, each end grain glue up was cut apart at a 5* angle. Glue cured, and they were then cut again, each at a different angle. Different widths. More glue curing time, and then I did it again. And then a 5th glue-up to get to where we are today: 9x very colorful chaos boards. Each is a minimum of 13-1/2″ x 19″; most are 14″ x 19″.
And there is a bonus, a new design of chaos board that in this case only has 2 species of wood. I call this design Confetti. Here you see that board as it started through the CNC for initial smoothing. That is a difficult step, as the multiple glue-ups leave a very ragged top and bottom that requires significant machining to get smooth. That process started on the CNC, and then moved to the drum sander … then finally to hand sanding and my normal hand-rubbed finish of mineral oil and locally-harvested beeswax.
The main project, though, was what became 9x Chaos Boards featuring 21x species, from 3 continents. Here are the woods used:
Afrormosia
Ash
Black Walnut
Bloodwood, AKA Satine
Bubinga
Canarywood
Cherry, AKA Black Cherry
Goncalo Alves, AKA Tigerwood
Hard Maple
Hickory
Honey Locust
Jatoba, AKA Brazilian Cherry
Makore
Osage Orange, AKA Hedge
Padauk
Purpleheart
Sapele, AKA African Mahogany
Wenge
White Oak
Yellowheart
Zebrawood
All of the boards have a chamfered edge (a cut, in this case, at a 45* angle) on each side, for easy pick up of the board. To ensure a dependable, un-moving work surface, all boards have non-skid rubber feet held on with stainless steel screws for long life. 5 of these boards have juice grooves that are 3/4″ wide and 3/8″ deep. 5 have no juice grooves, just the way Mrs M likes them. You get to choose to be groovy, or not. Mrs M made her choice. Just saying. I mean, she married me. Obviously.
Chaos 1 of 9. End Grain. 13-3/4″ x 19″ x 1-3/8″. $300.
Chaos 2 of 9. End Grain. Juice Groove. 14″ x 19″ x 1-3/8″. $325.
Chaos 3 of 9. End Grain. 14″ x 19″ x 1-3/8″. $325.
Chaos 4 of 9. End Grain. Juice Groove. 14″ x 19″ x 1-3/8″. $325.
Chaos 5 of 9. End Grain. 14″ x 22″ x 1-3/8″. $325.
Chaos 6 of 9. End Grain. Juice Groove. 14″ x 19″ x 1-3/8″. $325.
Chaos 7 of 9. End Grain. 14″ x 20-1/2″ x 1-3/8″. $325.
Chaos 8 of 9. End Grain. Juice Groove. 14″ x 19″ x 1-3/8″. $325.
Chaos 9 of 9. End Grain. 13-3/4″ x 19″ x 1-3/8″. $300.
Confetti Chaos Board. First one made. Hard Maple & Purpleheart. End Grain. Juice Groove. 14-1/2″ x 22″ x 1-3/8″. $325.
There are 4 questions to answer before you buy a cutting board … but I have some tips that will help inform those decisions for you. No wrong answers here: your cutting board is yours, and you need to like it. What other people do is their business. Thank goodness.
So, here are those all important 4 questions:
What size do you want the board to be?
What color do you want the board to be?
End grain or edge grain?
Juice groove or no?
When you answer those, you will make sure you are getting the board or boards you want and need. But here are those tips that will help smooth your process.
Where are you going to use the board? Is it mobile? Beside the sink? Beside the stove? On the island? Or … ? Wherever that special place is, get out your measure and see what the dimensions of the space are. If you have a galley kitchen with standard cabinets, you have 24” of depth to use. If you have appliances against the wall, then you only have 12” or depth or so to work with.
How many are you cooking for? Cooking for a family of 4 is different from cooking for you and your spouse. If this is a general purpose board that will be used to prepare large meals, I would recommend at least 14” X 18”.
Is this board single purpose? Some cooks like a dedicated board to only do onions and that stinking rose, garlic. Every cook is different. Maybe you want a set of 3 that are dedicated for meat, vegetables or bread. You get to choose. But, each of those purposes can dictate a different size and shape.
Does the board live on the counter, or do you need to store it at times? Storage of a board can be difficult the larger the board is. A handled board, though, can hang on the wall and add to the warmth of your kitchen.
Be Colorful! Most of the large retailers that sell cutting boards use overseas factories to make them, and they generally offer one or perhaps 2 woods or colors of boards. I have 40 woods in the shop, and all do find their way into cutting boards. So, you can match your décor. Contrast with your counter top. Indulge your eyes with your favorite colors.
Bigger is not always better. Cooks that prepare large hunks of meat often want very large, thick boards – but those come at a cost. Heavy is difficult to move, big is difficult to clean, not to mention storage! There is no need for a board to be more than 1-1/2” thick. More than that is making a statement, for sure, but it is not improving the performance of the board.
Smaller is not always better, either. The thinner the board, the less stable and more prone to warping or twisting it becomes. I do make my smallest boards, AKA Cheese Boards, about 8” x 10” x 5/8”, and those laminated assemblies are stable. People that use the ¼” thick bamboo boards sold in grocery stores … well, they will have issues using them, almost immediately.
End grain boards are harder and show less wear, but they require more time and better tools to construct properly. Time is often needed to custom order a “perfect” end grain board. Plan ahead.
Edge grain boards are perfectly fine when made from good hardwood. A quality cutting board will last for decades with minimal care. It all comes down to … do you like stripes? Or fancy patterns that look a little like a chess board?
Mrs M is a hard NO for juice grooves, and she is a serious cook, smoker & BBQ boss. Many people want juice grooves (they get to choose!), but the grooves do shrink the usable space available on the board. Add 2” to the height and width if you are getting a juice groove.
If you get a groove, make sure it is big enough to clean with your finger. And a brush or cloth! My standard is 3/4” wide x 3/8” deep. Smaller and deeper will cause you problems. I do also make grooves 1-1/4” wide on my Carnivore Boards, which is needed if you want to corral the juices from your Thanksgiving turkey.
Before you buy your board, pick one up. Move around with it. Cleaning it is a daily task, frequently multiple times in one meal when you practice good sterile technique. Make sure the board fits you as well as your kitchen.
I love talking to people about cutting boards. Good thing, huh?
But, seriously, I love the subject. Part of the joy I find is that everyone has a different view of what their cutting board should be. I think there are 4 questions:
What size of cutting board do you want?
What color do you want your board to be?
End grain, or edge grain?
Juice groove, or no?
No answer is wrong. Everyone’s situation is different! My job is to (hopefully) have a nice selection for people to choose from … because the choices are truly infinite.
Here are the latest additions to the selections I have on hand.
The sign in my booth says “Mr M’s Trivets – Protecting Hot Stuff Since 2017.”
And people still ask me, “What’s a trivet?” It’s a funny word, so I can see how people that are non-native English speakers might be challenged, but it’s more than that. Many people just aren’t familiar with the term – in any language. I’ve watched the younger generation ask their elders what a trivet is in their native language and get blank stares.
So that’s the first surprise: many people do not know what a trivet is. So my task is to help educate people, one trivet at a time.
The second surprise is much more artistic.
My trivets are popular, and the most popular purchase … is two, mismatched trivets.
I make the trivets from “blanks,” as I call them. Each blank makes 2x trivets, so people can buy a matched pair. They just don’t want to!
Well, not usually, anyway. Mrs M did want a matched set, so she did not embrace her love of chaos in this particular case. Not predictable, that one. Believe me, after 45 years, I don’t even try to predict her.
But I do work to protect the wonderful hot stuff coming from her kitchen.
Here are the latest trivets for shoppers this holiday season.
And with that statement, I define the most interesting thing about Lazy Susans.
No one knows WHY we call Lazy Susans … Lazy Susans. No one.
The first written instance that has been found was in a Vanity Fair magazine over a 100 years ago. My first Lazy Susans introduced this fact way back in 2014, when the Woodshop idea was but a dream. I did quickly learn that I could make Lazy Susans that people really liked … even as they had no idea why they called Susan Lazy.
See the link below back to that original post that explored the origins of a favorite serving piece. And, here you see the latest additions to my collection of the latest torments to all of the Susans in the world.
My Susans are about 17.5″ in diameter. The bearing that revolves is rated for 500 pounds … but I wouldn’t go there. As the weight increases, inertia will be a powerful problem to overcome. Because … physics.
Who knew that Susans being lazy could be so instructional?
Then I found the hardware needed to make cheese slicers. And, here we are.
Slicers are all approximately 7″ wide and 11″ long. The tightly stretched wire will cut hard cheese, soft cheese … all cheese. If you are an eater of cheese, you need to be a slicer of cheese.
There are now 22x of these slicers available, and pricing is between $50 and $90.
