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The Board Chronicles: California Artisan Cheese Festival 2023

henrymowry

The Board Chronicles is an ongoing series of articles about the adventures of Mr M’s Woodshop as a vendor at community festivals & craft fairs. Learn about the horrors of The Road. Read the impossible demands of the people that know what I should really be doing. In short, it’s the comedy of errors that has become my life, presented here, like my cutting boards, as simple unvarnished truth. All for your amusement … and for the good of vendor-kind.

I was very excited about journeying to Northern California to be a part of the California Artisan Cheese Festival in Santa Rosa. I’ve always been focused on serving pieces, and this seemed like a very nice, targeted event.

The year was 2020, and then the world went to hell.

The 2020 event was cancelled due to covid, of course, like almost every public event in California that year. And again in 2021. And, for many events especially early in the year, 2022 was not different. For 3 years, this event was lost to me.

Finally, 2023 became a new opportunity. Thank goodness.

This Festival is a series of events over a long weekend with artisan cheese classes, food pairing events, farm tours and more. On Sunday afternoon, a vendor event is produced with a very large group of artisanal cheese producers – many with their own herds for true farm-to-table cheese – as well as related vendors including vintners, brewers, distillers … and woodworkers, among others. About 100 vendors were gathered for this 5 hour event.

New Ideas

Observations

The display was more farmer’s market than fancy art boutique. It was a very casual atmosphere, a table top event (which, again, I never do these days). The promoter provided 2 8′ tables with short table cloths. I brought an additional 4′ table, and that was the total base of the display.

We arrived at 8a, and were set up by 9:30. The event didn’t start until 11, so we were perhaps a bit early. But you never know what the challenges are at a new event in an unfamiliar venue. It’s good to relax and check out the event before the masses arrive.

Mrs M being there means that she messes with my display. She improves the look of the booth, she says. She makes it better, she says. She increases sales, she says.

I have no idea what she’s talking about.

The floor was busy during this event. Estimated attendance of 1,500, all there to sample cheese and wine … and beer and nuts and bread and whatever vendors were giving away. Lines were 20+ people deep, 8-10 minutes for a “hot” vendor like Cowgirl Creamery or Beehive Cheese Company.

I had talked to the promoters about my unique presentation (compared to the food vendors sampling their creations, I was the weird one). They put me in a corner booth so people could walk on 2 sides of the booth. That was good.

They also put me across the building, in front of the bandstand. That was bad. (The band was primarily acoustic with a banjo, clarinet, tuba and percussionist. Very fun Americana music and not too loud.)

They also put me on the path to the bathroom. That was good. I guess.

Booth locations are something that I do my best to ignore, honestly. Vendors don’t control them. Why get upset about where you are when it’s someone else’s decision? I’ve run events. I’ve assigned vendors to booth locations. I’ve also dealt with upset vendors that just lost their minds because their location … wasn’t whatever they thought it should be. I don’t want to be that guy. My location was FINE. People could see me. We were not blocked by a line. If people were looking for a wooden object, they knew where I was.

But I brought cheese boards … I didn’t bring chess boards. That was a request. As were book shelves. I politely said sorry! … just as I happily dispensed free advice on how to deal with a permanently mounted wooden cutting board embedded into a stone counter. I am old, so I must be wise. I guess.

There were actually 4 woodworkers there. Two were really focused on traditional cutting boards and one exclusively made seascape resin boards using that dreaded bulbous grass, AKA bamboo, as their base. Truly I did not compete with any of them.

My first 3 sales were Charcuterie Kits and Serving Trays. Vindicated, I was.

And I said that out loud to the Lady. So, of course, I didn’t sell another one.

For a five hour event that was an excuse to drive 400 miles … this was a winner. I sold enough to pay the entire hotel bill, gas and vendor fee. The Lady got to geek out on cheese … and found the highly-sought cheeses that are used in the world’s best grilled cheese sandwich (found at the Rustic Bakery & Muir Woods National Forest) as well as the fabulous Very Adult Mac & Cheese from the Market in St Helena. Both of these dishes served as destinations for us during the weekend, so buying the necessary cheeses was a great coup.

Sometimes, going a-vendoring is about the journey, not the destination. I’m taking the win on this one.

The Food

When we travel, the Lady busies herself in the passenger seat stalking restaurants in our destination city to choose the ultimate, best dinner she could find. It’s her thing. This trip, however, it just worked out that we did lunches as our culinary adventures, and “settled” for take out most evenings.

The Facts

Boards sold: 15

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