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The Board Chronicles: Carpinteria Arts & Crafts Faire

The Board Chronicles is an ongoing series of articles about the adventures of Mrs M’s Handmade as a vendor at community festivals & craft fairs. Mrs M’s subsidiary, Mr M’s Woodshop, has been approved to create this chronicle for the good of vendorkind.

The Carpinteria Valley Museum of History hosts a monthly swap meet-type affair on its grounds, and in November it transforms into a holiday boutique featuring handmade goods only.

I did the event solo last year, and did it poorly. We decided that I would only take boards, but it was near the end of my inventory last year … so I didn’t have a good stock.

And then I left one container of boards at home, to boot.

But it was a lovely day in Carpinteria. 70+ degrees, sunny, blue skies … what’s not to like on a Thanksgiving Saturday? Total sales were only $285, though … but I enjoyed the day, and we decided to do the event again. After all, it fit on the calendar.

So we doubled down, and the elder Mrs M joined me to see if we could have a better day with a full effort.

New Ideas

Observations

A senior citizen walked into the booth, and eventually declared that he was an 80-year old cabinet maker that had built over 100 houses in Carpinteria. He said he had a complete shop, but he just didn’t go into it much anymore. He asked what glue I used, and when I said “Titebond III” he said he’s never heard of it. He came back a minute later, and asked me to write it down for him so he could investigate. I’d taught him something, he said, and he wanted to look it up.

OK.

Then he stepped in close to me, and in sotto voice, said, “Don’t get mad at me. I don’t know what side you’re on. Don’t get mad at me.” “OK,” I said. (Where in the world is this going to lead???)

“A man walked into the White House, walked up to the guard, and asked to speak to President Obama. The guard replied, ‘Sir, it’s 2017. President Obama is not the President anymore.’ The man left.

“The next day, the man returned and walked up to the same guard. He asked to speak to President Obama. The guard replied, ‘Sir, as I told you yesterday, it’s 2017. President Obama is not here. He’s not President anymore.’ The man left.

“The third day, the man again returned and walked up to the same guard. He asked to speak to President Obama. The guard replied, ‘Sir, it’s 2017. As I’ve told you for the last 2 days, President Obama is not here. Why do you keep asking me that question?’

The confident reply: “Because it sounds so damn good to hear you say it.”

With that, my retired cabinet maker turned on his heel and left the booth to the sound of my laughter. To quote Larry the Cable Guy, “I don’t care who you are, that’s funny.”

The Food

Saturday Breakfast: Jack In The Box # 28

Saturday Lunch: Taquitos, sold by the Museum. They bought frozen and served them for $1 each with salsa & guacamole. Same lunch I had last year, and they were the only thing I saw not handmade at this event.

Saturday Snack: nope. Velda wanted to go to the bake sale … but didn’t.

Saturday Dinner: Thanksgiving leftovers, of course.

The Facts

Boards sold: 8

Large Sous Chef Board: 3

Cutting Board: 1

Small Board: 1

Cheese Board: 1

Medium Surfboard: 1

Chess Board: 1

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